Gummmmmmmmmmm

HAHAHAH so funny. i forgot my youtube account or maybe i din really have one so i went to create another one just now. i tried mihiak, usernam taken. Gummm also taken.

Gummmm

Gummmmm

Gummmmmm

also taken! haha i cant rmbr how many m's i typed before it was available but it is just so funny. lol. so popular sia. Gummmmmmmmm haha wad kind of username is this.

i need to be nice again.

haha. i changes my msn nick to this yday.

it has really been a long long time since i recall last being nice. real nice. i think i've grown more selfish more sarcastic and more insensitive over this period of say two to three years? i hope to change things and be nice again.

haha sounds lame. i guess its not. cos i like to be nice. the feeling is great. haha my greatest joy is derived from being able to make ppl laugh and to be nice to them. but its qt distant still.

why do i have such thoughts? well, its not a sudden thing, have been thinking abt it over some time. using sarcastic remarks and being lame is one of my trademarks now, but thats not wat i truely am (i hope) or want to be. thats why i think i am easily misunderstood. cos i am lame ppl think im not serious abt certain stuff and cos im sarcastic or speak with opposite meanings i may be perceived as rude/ not so frenly. in addition, i have been nua and lazy these days that i sometimes dun bother to do nice things alr. which is S.A.D.

if i think, but i dun do, no pt also. so i guess i have to start real soon.

two days ago, i did something nice and i felt =D. haha, good for a start.

well, it was raining when we needed to move to LT32. However, only i had an umbrella with me and minkhai and weiquan did not bring. so we had to share! three persons to one umbrella wasnt very effective!? den in front of us, there were three girls without umbrellas and they were kinda getting wet. i said to minkhai, who was holding the umbrella, let them use la! but of cos, its not very normal for someone to do that and he hesitated before handing the umbrella back to me lol. den we tried to walk another distance with 3 in 1 umbrella and it still sucks as we are walking damn slow plus we are still getting wet.

soon, the two of them gave up and decided to zhi ben to the LT instead. haha. and i, holding the umbrella all to myself, walked a distance before finally deciding, hey, its time to make a move. so, i approached the last of three ladies (the other two walked faster ahead)and asked her if she was going to LT 32, den handed over my umbrella and zoomed off to the LT first. later on den i waited for her at the top to get my umbrella back.

okay i know i was a bit late to offer she was alr wet from the rain. but then, its a good start i suppose. at least i stepped out and did wad i felt i ought to do. haha. likes. and from then on, i need to move forward.



talking abt thinking: hey its time to make a move, i think i need such courage and pushing factor and force behind me more frequently. i need to think this way and do things that are stuck there halfway ie undecided and go for it. that day damn lame. was at the bus stop and then this packed bus came and the passengers in front were trying to squeeze their way in, but there was still space at the rear of the bus. they just wouldnt move in! sucks right? this situation is common la. den again, how many times do u actually see someone saying, hey can u move in? rarely. most of the time, you look at me, i look at you, like its always the other person's responsibility to move or do something abt it! so i thought, hey its time to do something.

i was still at the bus stop and i went near the back of the bus and TRIED to signal some of the passengers to move but apparently, either i wasnt obvious enough, or they thought i was crazy, or they could not be bothered. well, i was still a bit embarrassed thus i wasnt sure of my actions either. today i made a sign saying PLEASE MOVE IN on an A4 size paper. hahahha not sure if i will get the chance to use it, but lets see.


back to the topic, i need to be nice again. i hope i rmbr and improve by the day, to be a better person than i was the day b4.

SINCE IM IN THE MOOD TO BLOG,

i shall post one more entry. three in one day! haha record alr la. for this month. speaking of month, today is last day of august and tmr is teachers' day! woohoo! but sad today got lessons cannot go back dhs / hc.

just got back my lab report for matlab and i got 100! haha. although not totally unexpected because alr heard of ppl getting full marks before i received that email from my TA, its a pleasant surprise nonetheless. haha.

and he only commented ONE line on my entire assignment! lols. makes it feel lame... and he says tmr will change to another TA oh great. now wad is the new guy like man.. haha.

++++

i have just this awkwardness with some ppl, i think its inevitable to have such feelings with ppl u cant agree or click with. hmm.

at first i thot ++++ was quite cool but it turned out that now i feel ++++ is just too dao. there is just this dao look that i cant really try to talk or strike convo. hmm. then again, i need to reflect. am i equally that dao to some ppl? maybe its not ++++ who is daoing me, but its a mutual feeling ie i think ++++ is dao and ++++ thinks im damn dao. lol. i think i have not stepped out and be open totally in uni esp, still have reservations. maybe too long nv enthu and also ageing a bit alr. losing the vigour HAHA.

but, it is just disappointing how ++++ is so "dao" and i dun really understd why. hmmm is it just the look? oh wells. i dun even noe why and how this thing had affected me to warrant a blog entry.

zzz.

headache

headache! EG1413 is really giving me headaches. i dunno why i cant think critcally and critique work sia. its like, i know i dun really welcome this module too much but basically its not really english that i need to be good at to understd this module, it is more of thinking! i wonder why i cant think at higher levels =( i really suck at EG..

and today, i guess due to the squeezing of all my brain juices yday night for EG, i had a slight headache in sch today and its still there (mildly) now.

later gotta look into matlab assignment as well hope it doesnt worsen my headache TOO MUCH.

tmr going to play table tennis for a little little while during lunch break, and probably on wednesday night too! I NEED SOME DESTRESSSSSSS!!!!!!!!

(okay i'm not really THAT stressed)

(Y)

NUS IS THE BUMPING GROUND

haha, yes u did not read wrongly. i'm talking abt BBBumping ground, not DDDumping ground. dumping ground would be too err xin haha and i do not feel that way. i like NUS and have faith in local uni. doesnt mean u are in singapore thats becos u cmi for overseas u.

okay. enough of poor engrish.

wad i mean is, going to NUS enables/causes me to bump into ppl, random ppl! haha. all the time.

im sure it doesnt only apply to me, most undergrads would have this kind of feeling. its like, everywhr you go, u meet someone familiar or someone u know. its nice to meet old frens whom u kinda not been in contact with, but sometimes its quite scary everywhr u go, a few steps u stop and say hi to some fren. den another few steps u meet someone u know again. den another few ur fren's fren, and the scenario continues!! den on the bus, another old classmate pops up. den on the train, another two! ahar!!

Everywhr u go, theres someone u noe. haha. like u get stuck halfway walk a few steps b4 u need to stop again..

And its really very coincidental sometimes. had many of such experiences alr so far. three weeks of NUS. haha. shall name out some another time.

GO NUS = MENG BUMP.

PROF KOH

hahaha i have this MA1505 lecturer who is damn funny and entertaining. its almost impossible to fall aslp in class! haha im a huge fan of him and look forward to his lectures. and just i have created a fb group for him! hope the member size can increase and spread LOL.

He loves to say STAY COOL AND CALM. and laughs like HAHAHA / HOHOHO. haha just like a frenly uncle.

Cool.

And i need to keep blogging again so at least i have an output, rather than keeping everything insideee.

100th post!

HAHA its my 100th post on this blog! woohoo! haha. to celebrate this milestone. i shall not rant abt man u's loss. ZZZ sian diao...

but i have nth much happy to say also. lol. so thats all for now!

the layout is back!

lol i wanted to come in and blog, den suddenly the layout of the blogger posting page is back for now!! hope it stays like this.

i wanted to say,


i tell myself not to judge, but i do, i do..

bloggg

haha i suddenly feel like blogging more often, but when i log onto this page and the format goes haywire, the feeling sucks. haha but anw, just to leave short note here.

hmm. sch start two weeks alr, and i am still not quite "used to it" as in i still haven found the exact comfort zone yet. i guess its just my mentality at work. cos inside i still dun welcome undergrad studies with an open heart. hmm.

AND, i haven studied or done anything acedamic yet. zz. other than listening to lecturer haha. i think im too slack and i NEED TO CHANGE SOON. maybe when i stop resisting the idea of studying i will cope better and be happier? ppl ard me are just mugging too much or at least they claim or act as if. hahaha.

as of prev months, i still have yet to find the SPARK and INSPIRATION to light up my life. i srsly need something to make me feel confident once more and be the GUM i used to be, and to be a better gum than i was. i want to be me again. sounds stupid. zz i need something. i lack something in my life.

溏心风暴

yday i saw the 预告 for 溏心风暴 chn 8 9pm, and i miss 常在心!! lol. and also the show of cos. its really one of the best shows i have watched and perhaps cos that period was post ORD and i was very into it. was searching for some scenes on youtube, NICE. likes.

Do it, only if u mean it.

the following note was posted to my fb page in a weak attempt to get one hidden msg across:

national day, and it was 822 time.

i planned for it and while at home, my bro and i stood in front of the tv broadcasting the ndp live and placed our fists on our chests and recited the pledge.

However, when two boys are around, they tend to play a fool and laugh abt things, thus i din really take some time off and think abt the pledge itself, and wad it meant. we even joked abt it and said out the lines that appeared on the screen like: YOU KNOW THE WORDS out loud.

After that, i thought abt it, and i felt kind of bad/guilty. plus tot of these two lines they displayed:

Say what you mean,
Mean what you say.

THAT, is the main message i wanna bring across here.

ppl tend to do things for fun, for joy, for entertainment. however, sometimes they do not realise that it may affect someone else. u might be joking, but when u say something to someone it might have an impact. or u might take some event as a joke while a listener nearby thinks its an insult to the matter.

thus, i have been trying to do things only if i mean it, and say things only if i mean it. But obviously it is not working out, especially nowadays when i add sacarsm to my dictionary. i think i need to put my mindset back on track here.

and for someone out there, if u read this, i hope u will say wat u mean, and do wat u really mean. and not do things just for fun, or to grab attention. cos i have been rather affected by ppl who do things for the sake of doing it, seemingly without meaning and definitely affecting some ppl in the process. Even though its not life-threatening but small little things do collectively make an impact, makes me feel irritated...

Say it, only if u mean it.
Do it, only if u mean it.
Like it, only if u mean it.

I would very much appreciate it, and saying this, of cos i mean it.

FIRST DAY OF SCH (OFFICIAL)

haha today is the first day of sch, worthy of a new blog entry.

even though i have been ard sch and such,and its only ONE two-hr lecture today, there is still a feeling of anxiety for school looks to begin. mugging to go full blast SOON. hahaha.

but as always, i tend to think so much and my life in NUS, will definitely turn out fine =D

RUN AHHHH

There is somthing wrong, probably with some settings, such that i cant view some websites in their intended way. for example, in blogger, certain text are like out of the box and various weird things floating ard somethings, and my edit panel in this "new post" box is missing. zzz. same happens for fb, sometimes the bard disappear as well. thus, it is very discouraging.

anws, OOOMMGGG safra singapore bay run is just less than two weeks away! i tot it was still far! walao sd haven train yet. thus, today finally picked my butt up and ran for 20 minutes, for a start. haven ran since i left my job at messier i think. ~ three weeks. zzz.

today's pace was minimal. going to increase the intensity gradually and hope i will be able to complete the 10km comfortably, without having to push myself too much =D probably have to go running at least once in two days? next week sch start le think will have even less time to run bahhhhhh.. better make use of this free week since i nv go oweek! hahaha.

but im still feeling a bit sad im not ther for oweek, its like. kind of feels like a must go, part of undergraduate life eh? but then again. if i had to go, i might be feeling v sian as i have to go through many of the same things again from chess camp, and the sleeping environment is much more cui this time. its like in NUS, like along corridors or something.

Realised something

i realised something.

If i dont blog, there will not be new updates on my blog.

fullstop